1. Where will SPX be trading when Santa comes down the chimney?
a) above1250
b)1150- 1250
c) below 1150
2. What will Europe have pulled out of the hat by December 24th?
a) A Schengen-based fiscal union around which to structure mutual support.
b) A battered can, to be place kicked into January.
c) Sorry, don't understand the question as Europe cannot currently be defined.
3. By year-end the Middle East will see (multiple answers allowed) :
a) The Syrian leadership be toppled.
b) Egypt have become the most democratic country on the planet.
c) Egypt be boiling in blood.
d) Libya be teetering on Somalian warlord rule
4. And Italy's 10 yr yields will be:
a) over 8%.
b) under 6%.
c) Unavailable due to the EU banning trading in them.
5. In 2012 China's economy will be:
a) A smouldering property market train wreck with HSCEI at 6k.
b) Moving BRICs like back in the day with 9% growth. Jim O'Neill will publish a note simply titled "Todja, didn't I?".
c) Bumbling along, 7-8.5% growth, with HSCEI no higher than 11k.
d) Revolution! All your equities belong to Great Hong, son of Holy same sex couple of Buddha and Jesus.
6. As BRICs has become an overused term which new country grouping acronym would you propose?
a) Turkey, Uzbekistan, Romania, Denmark & Sweden.
b) Chad, Romania, Afghanistan & Paraguay.
c) Brazil, Oman, Liberia, Lithuania, Oman, China, Korea & Switzerland.
7. The IPO of Facebook said to value the company at $100bn is:
a) A great opportunity to Buy (Like).
b) Groupontastic.
c) Facebook? Wasn't that soooo 2011?
8. If you are receiving fixed rates on Euro swap, what does paying 6m Euribor in EUR mean?
a) What it says on the tin.
b) 6M FIBOR in DEM.
c) 6M ATHIMID in GRD.
d) Some blended rate in ECU-2.
e) Who cares, my counterparty already went bust so I'm fucked
9. Where will DEM/ITL trade post breakup?
a) 1100
b) 1400
d) Down at the Mithras
e) On an e-platform run by the Vatican.
f) On an e-platform run by the Bundeathstar.
10. Gilts are:
a) The new safe haven.
b) A great way to stuff the Japanese.
c) Something you have after forgetting your wife's birthday.
d) something that an Italian would love instead of BTPs, but as the word is unknown in his vocabulary he will never have.
11. Merv's remarks about the massive bookkeeping profits on the AFP are:
c) Asinine as it will have every part of government clamouring to spend it.
b) Solely down to his financial brilliance.
c) Solely down to his own belief in his financial brilliance.
12. Silver is:
a) Money.
b) Metal.
c) Way to fleece clients through theta.
d) The word that normally comes after "hi ho".
e) Tarnished.
13. The Sun is:
a) A shiny bright object last seen in the UK by a past generation.
b) A shiiity light objectionable publication in the UK run by a past generation.
c) The first name of your next boss.
14. The disclosure that Hank Paulson gave a bunch of ex-GS hedge fund mates the heads up on how the Fannie & Freddie bailouts were going to go down is:
a) A friendly thing to have done.
b) Yet more evidence of Crony Capitalism, likely to add fire to the OWS campaign.
c) Not a surprise.
d) Going to land at least one of those guys present in jail.
e) A lie... He would never do that.
15. How do you make a billion dollars?
a) Start with $10bn and invest in airlines.
b) Start with $10k and invest it in that nerdy kid down the hallway's thing he keeps on talking about to stalk girls on campus.
c) GoldsheepleBer-nankfiatmoneyRonPaul.
d) Apply academic theory regarding optimal currency unions to CDS trading circa January 2010.
16. Who is coming to Jim Chanos' Xmas Dinner Party?
a) Wife 1.
b) Kids.
c) 6 Czech models.
d) All of the above.
e) Client No. 9.
17. Today's BTP auction was:
a) A disaster as Italy had to pay 7.5 % for 10 yr money.
b) A great result compared to what people were dreading.
c) An excuse to further squeeze the market shorts by the knadgers.
d) Only filled thanks to a buy one get one free offer on the back of Kellogi's Corniflakies?
18. The FSA report into the RBS/ABN deal:
a) Was amazingly insightful: "FSA CALLS RBS DEAL ON ABN `RECKLESS' GAMBLE".
b) The product of 3yrs of hard investigation.
c) Another example of regulator too busy looking backwards to allocate blame rather than looking forwards to prevent it.
d) Cost 40bn quid.
19. Wiedmann is:
a) The name of the German detective in Inglorious Bastards.
b) The name of a secret plot to cause the break up of the EUR.
c) The name of the man at the Bundeathstar.
d) Not on TMMs Xmas card list.
20. The current market moves:
a) Are great, we are loving them.
b) Are a 12 yr old quant's nightmare.
c) Are an excuse to shut up shop 'til Xmas.
d) Can be explained by feeding torn up news items into a rat's cage and seeing which ones they devour and then vomit out of the cage.
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